lowtax is a stone cold player from the old school

perfect scrotum wrote on Sep 29, 2007 11:04:
dont worry about the ads man the forums kick ass and anyone who whines is a busta


Lowtax wrote on Sep 29, 2007 10:19:
I shall be on the lookout for these "bustas" from this point onward


perfect scrotum wrote on Sep 29, 2007 11:23:
every time you see a whiny busta you shoudl serve up an ice cold Ban Sandwich


Lowtax wrote on Sep 29, 2007 10:50:
When I encounter such a "busta" in question, I shall act appropriately according to the SA Forums rules and regulations.

ya im like a graham cracker cuz im so sweet

secret noob: hey
bb: hey
secret noob: whatup
bb: thisgirl just sned me mesage "How can you live, cracka?"
bb: what does that mean
bb: why wouldnt i be able to live
secret noob: she wants ur boner
bb: no cuz thats not even what shes trying to say thaere
bb: how can you live
bb: what
bb: caracka?
bb: WQHAT
secret noob: be like i aint no cracker im more like a corndog
bb: then what do i say
bb: i like this so far
secret noob: and then if shes into it
secret noob: good
secret noob: and if not
secret noob: be like "cuz im corny!!!!
bb: corny?
secret noob: thats ur backpedal
bb: that doesnt even
secret noob: if u need it
bb: what if shes into it tho
secret noob: corn dog
bb: cuz my weiner is in a sheath of like pancake orsomethin
secret noob: then be like "i will put my corndog into ur vagaina
bb: ilmao
secret noob: let me know how this all works out
bb: dude im not gonna do that
bb: u are just trying to get me to say something dumb for so yoyu can hvae a laugh about it
secret noob: whatever
secret noob: thats what i would do
bb: i will put my corndog into your vaaina is a horrible thing to say to a nice girl
bb: and i dont want to say im corny either cuz im not
secret noob: lol
secret noob: be like monkey cheese
bb: no dude.
bb: no
secret noob: that works with girls
secret noob: they love that shit
bb: i dont do monkey cheese humor anymore
bb: not even for girls
secret noob: pirate monkey then
bb: NO MAN
secret noob: ninja robot
bb: i want a girl who is a Humour Elitist
secret noob: y
secret noob: she will prolly be ugly
bb: so i dont have to listen to ninja robot pirate monkey cheese pie jokes all day
secret noob: ya
secret noob: thas y i broke up with my last gf
bb: why did she ask how i can live
secret noob: no she said cheese or something
bb: does that make sense
bb: CRACKA
bb: she called me a cracka (im white)
secret noob: cheese and craccka
secret noob: call her a nigger
bb: no thats too advance d humor
secret noob: hmm
secret noob: this is complicated
bb: i knwo!!!!!!
secret noob: be like "ya im a graham cracker cuz im so sweet"
bb: i thought you were good at this shit
secret noob: lol
bb: YOU are the corny one
secret noob: you need to call her someting
secret noob: like a food
secret noob: but more sexual
secret noob: be like i could be the chhese on ur cracker
secret noob: cheese
bb: i dont ever even talk to this girl
secret noob: cheese
bb: IM THE CRACKEr
secret noob: cheese
secret noob: ok, she could be teh "easy cheese"
bb: i have to remain the cracker for the duration of the metaphor
bb: GIRLS DONT LIKE TO BE CALLED EASY CHEESE
secret noob: i like to put stuff on my crackers
bb: SO
secret noob: thas what u should say
secret noob: she is the stuff
bb: lmao
secret noob: get it?
bb: yeah but wkill she make that connection????
secret noob: yes
secret noob: hurry
secret noob: god
bb: i have time
secret noob: have u not answered her yet
secret noob: what
bb: i told her i was a slow typer
secret noob: lol
secret noob: well thats teh best i got
secret noob: what r u gonna say
bb: why did she ask how i can live
bb: what the hell is that
secret noob: she is just typing shit
secret noob: she didnt think abou tit
bb: ok i will say
bb: ok
secret noob: u shouldnt either
bb: i wont think about it
bb: ill just say
bb: "i like to put stuff on my crackers"
secret noob: lol
secret noob: cool
bb: sounds kinda sexual in a bad way but w/e im not thinking about it
secret noob: good work
secret noob: girls like that
bb: or maybe i will say the other thing like "ya im a graham cracker cuz im so sweet"
bb: acctually im goin with that one
secret noob: whatever
bb: is that o.k.
secret noob: thats good too
secret noob: it depends on the girl
secret noob: i dont know the girl
bb: shes cooler than me
secret noob: id go graham then
secret noob: shes not a rape victim trash?
bb: no
secret noob: go graham then
bb: k
secret noob: maybe now would be a good time to tell you im horrible with girls
bb: me 2
secret noob: i bet ure better than me
bb: but u lift weights 24/7 doesnt that help
secret noob: iliked the graham cfracker line though
bb: i havent done that in years
secret noob: i dont even lift weights
bb: yea im glad i used the graham cracker
secret noob: thats whats s o funny
bb: dude you have never stopped lifting weights ever
bb: i dont even know how you're typing right now
secret noob: i stoped about 5 yrs ago
secret noob: mabye 4
secret noob: i used to be huge
secret noob: people accused me of steroids and my jeans didnt fit
secret noob: but that didnt raelly help with girls anyway
bb: so r u sayin that u are huge steroid man and i am an out of shape nerd that is better with girls
secret noob: sort of
secret noob: but im out of shape now too
secret noob: so howd your graham line work

so today

ok so i woke up a little past my alarm but made it to class on time, but i dont really care about that class so whatever. then i have a free hour, sometimes i get food but today i wanted to catch up on my reading so i went to the library

on the way to the library there was a guy with a gross aborted fetus sign and he was waving it around and yelling at us babykillers so i said some bad words to him as i walked by (actually i ignored him but other people were yelling at him)

anyway in the library i have like three or four main places that i sit to read, one on each floor

i got these because my freshman year i had a big falling out with my roommate and i really didn't want to see him or deal with him for the last couple weeks of classes so i spent a lot of time in the library (this turned out to have a wonderful effect on my academics) and i just tended to go to the same places again and again because i get pretty comfortable with stuff like that

anyway my favorite place on the first floor is in the maps section, and it's probably the most quiet place of them all. i think its for like geography or geology majors or whatever because there are like thousands and thousands of maps in there. anyway it's tucked away behind a side-staircase so its kind of just this little nook of a place where the majority of people never go. there's a weirdly big bathroom in there too. i like it because it's next to this closed-off hallway that led outside at one point and you can see all the people goin by. also i like that there are a bunch of weird people in there looking at maps because who the hell needs to look at maps

anyway the little cubicle seats there dont have the little light on the overhang which i don't like and i usually like to be on a higher floor anyway

so my places on the second and third floors are in the same hallway, just on a different level. it's in a hallway inbetween the main area and some weirder side stuff (like law books and shit) and there are little desks along the sides that i like to use. these are nice because they have nice bathrooms nearby too

i guess why im so preoccupied with being close to a bathroom is because i have this really crappy runny nose (i dont know if its like an allergy thing or a cold or somethin) so i have to go to the bathroom to blow my nose every thirty seconds and i dont want to walk across the library with a little bead of glistening snot shining out for everyone to see

anyway

all these were taken today so i actually went and sat on the couches because for some reason there was barely anyone on those. they're just these little padded chairs basically and the way the last person had set it up they had one butted up against the other (im guessing they were sleeping) and so i actually put my feet up on it but didnt know if i should feel bad about that. anyway i read there for the hour and then went off to my classes

my second class kinda sucked because i was behind on the reading last time and i got the quiz back and it's not that the grade matters (there is only one paper due all year in that course and mine is already done) but i want that professor to write me a letter of rec for grad school and i dont want him to think i'm a slouch

third class was fun because i am caught up on the reading in there and that professor (who i also want to write me a letter of rec) was trying to see where the class was at in terms of comprehending the text and i tried to give a synopsis but he stopped me and told me he knew that i knew and he was worried about the rest of the class

that was a nice ego boost because he had just asked me some questions about grad school that really exposed how little i knew what i was doing and i was worried he would think i wasn't serious about it

anyway there's this train that cuts through the middle of my town and i got caught right behind the train today. they say you're supposed to turn your car off so i did and basically just sat there worrying about grad school the whole time with just my music on

anyway the train finally passed but the light right after it was red so i only got to move like ten feet before i had to stop again at the intersection

and I'm the first one in the row, so there's nothing blocking my view of the intersection. At that moment, a girl my age (perhaps a bit older) on a bicycle starts crossing the street in front of me, when a car comes from the other side of the street (I presume he was trying to catch the yellow but I don't remember exactly, he may have even been turning). The car was pretty low to the ground and it was moving reasonably fast so when it hit her, both her and the bike went up onto the hood of the car and proceeded to fly (impossibly high) into the air. I was the closest other human being to this and even now I entertain thoughts of heroically springing from my car in time to catch her. Unfortunately, I seemed capable only of stasis as she and the detached bike alike spun horribly yet perfectly across the view from behind my windshield.

She landed on her side in a pretty forgiving way, and I presume that most of the fall was taken by her thigh and her arm. Although I don't believe her head hit very hard, she had slid enough such that her face had made contact and the pavement had scraped her on the cheek and forehead. Just as she had landed, she leaned up ever so slightly - as though she were fine, and needed to get out of the intersection before she got hit by a car or something. A moment later, however, she seemed to remind herself that this had already occurred, and she decided that she would stay down. It was the most subtle movement ever, and I am sure that it was lost on everyone else who saw it - even the cyclist - but in my mind it was the most peculiar and memorable moment of the whole ordeal.

As soon as this had happened, a tow truck from the other side of the street pulled into the intersection. At this, I remembered where I was and got out of the car for some more heroic inaction. By the time I had gotten out of my car, the man from the tow truck was already on the phone with the ambulance (some other, more efficient witness asked him from my side of the street), and there were two or three other people kneeling by the girl, trying to see if she was ok. She seemed more shaken than anything, and I knew from my incredibly clear view of everything that her fall was an incredibly lucky one. I relaxed a bit when she smiled up at something one of the other people had said.

Once she had given me this reassurance, I looked around to see all the other bewildered drivers. Some people behind my car were already honking, but I did them the favor of assuming that they couldn't see the commotion from where they were. My eyes finally found the driver that hit her - who was an extremely young, pudgy boy who was clearly terrified. He was shaking horribly - not a shiverish, small shake, but a more full-muscled, constant stutter. It were as though he were sobbing uncontrollably, only he wasn't crying yet. He had to hold his cell phone with both hands in order to pound his mother's number in with his frantic thumbs. He was undoubtedly the worst possible messenger in this situation and I'm sure he needlessly terrified his mother quite a bit with his vague instructions for her to come quick. I wanted to say something to comfort him, but a more fatherly soul from my side of the street had already gone over and patted him on the back a couple times in futility.

At this point, my roommate, Neff, comes running in from my right. He hadn't seen me, and with an efficiency unique to him, he introduced himself to the girl, told her he was C.P.R. certified, and somehow remembered all the questions to ask her in these circumstances. Somehow knowing that she was ok, and having seen this familiar face gave me yet another level of my awareness back, and I considered tapping him on the shoulder to begin discussing the incident but decided against it given the circumstances (namely, the poor girl on the ground).

Then, a woman in scrubs runs by me and kneels by the girl, telling everyone that she is a doctor (as though the scrubs weren't topical enough). At this, the situation seemed to be in pretty good control and I was able to call Neff's attention - we grinned at each other and decided it would be best if we discussed this back at the apartment.

Satisfied with my absolute lack of action, I got my car out of the middle of the intersection and went home. I havent eaten yet so i just nuked this frozen quesadilla from tgi fridays and theyre pretty decent but i must have put it in there for too long because its guts kinda bubbled out of the side and it's burning the shit out of my tongue right now

hey babe lets go to a coffee shop and read big books together

i want to bask in the miasmatic effluence of our collective pretension

thx to baglod

Auditor was a strange dog. For more than 17 years he lived alone in the barren waste dumps, leach pads, and mine roads surrounding the rim of the huge Berkeley Pit strip mine in Butte, Montana. He was an unfriendly, dirty mutt, resembling a pile of stained rags. The dog shunned human contact, but the miners respected his toughness and named him "Auditor" because he would always show up when least expected.

They built him a shanty, made him a bed of rags, and left food and water for him. Auditor defied conventional wisdom that said nothing could live in the toxic Superfund site. The peaceful looking "pond" in the Berkeley Pit is poisonous enough to kill birds that land on it, as several hundred snow geese did in 1995.

Even before he died in 2003, money was raised to build a monument to the dreadlocked dog. The larger-than-life, 300 pound bronze statue with a copper patina (the Berkeley Pit was a copper mine) has been displayed in a local coffee shop, then a shopping mall, and currently the Butte-Silver Bow Chamber of Commerce. The statue will eventually be put on permanent display at the Berkeley Pit Viewing Stand, along with a plaque telling Auditor's story.

i'm the motherflippin

Powerlifter047: i'm the motha bt
NightStalkerXj: motha bt?
Powerlifter047: motha f'n bt
Powerlifter047: THE
Powerlifter047: motha f'n bt
NightStalkerXj: why don't you say fuckin
Powerlifter047: cause i'm polite
NightStalkerXj: how is f'n more polite then fuckin
Powerlifter047: sounds better, lol, g rated
NightStalkerXj: but you say shit
NightStalkerXj: shit is on the same level with fuck
Powerlifter047: naaa
Powerlifter047: lol
Powerlifter047: oh, i have a friend coming over
Powerlifter047: we'll continue this conversation later
NightStalkerXj: Bye.
Powerlifter047: bt is PEACE
NightStalkerXj: Fuckin' a

...

...For whan thy labour doon al is,
And hast y-made rekeninges,
In stede of reste and newe thinges,
Thou gost hoom to thy hous anoon;
And, also domb as any stoon,
Thou sittest at another booke
Til fully daswed is thy looke
And livest thus as an hermyte
Although thyn abstinence is lyte.